


Malice

by kitsune



Category: Hockey RPF, Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Columbus Blue Jackets, Crack, Drabble, Gen, Los Angeles Kings, San Jose Sharks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-29
Updated: 2015-10-14
Packaged: 2018-02-23 03:44:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2532914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitsune/pseuds/kitsune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><s>Two Three Four</s> Five drabbles, three NHL teams, a pinch of Teen Wolf fanon, and a teensy-weensy plot. Chapter 5 starts the 2015-2016 season.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Time Out

**Author's Note:**

> This unlikely crossover ignores all sorts of TW canon.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Good help is hard to find.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by Columbus Blue Jackets coach Todd Richards:
> 
> _Whether I've done something or somebody did something to the hockey gods, I've never seen anything like it. It seems like every time we play a game somebody gets hurt._

Stiles answered the unknown number cautiously. Ohio?

A man said crisply, "This is Todd Richards. Todd McLellan said you came in after the playoffs and destroyed the curse in their locker room.”

Stiles flopped onto the settee allegedly for visitors (the quantity of hair on it suggested it was the frequent napping place of several somethings large and furry). "Yeah, supernatural sabotage. Brutal, man.”

“I might have something similar.”

“Right. Gimme the details.”

Five minutes later he sidled into Lydia’s office. “So the Columbus Blue Jackets just hired us,” he said. “Do we think Jeff Carter is freelancing magic again?”


	2. Match Penalty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who commented and gave me ideas for this little sequel. It's just as silly as the first one, sorry.

Stiles said, "Guys, except for a rink built over ancient burial grounds and a witch who doesn't like half-naked ice girls, all your injuries had a common cause."

He eyed the coaches warily. Stiles wasn't worried about the four werewolves, the merman, or the ice sprite he could identify, it was the humans who were dangerously unpredictable. "We broke the curse, but who commissioned it...well, you gotta take care of that yourselves. I'll just, uh, send the bill to Bettman." As he escaped the room someone snarled, "I can't _believe_ the CBC put a supernatural hit on the NHL!"


	3. Instigating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth about Commissioner Bettman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to **rhubarbpie** for the idea. Remember, every time you boo Bettman the apocalypse gets a little closer.

Gary bowed obsequiously as the demon’s image appeared. "Yes, Lord?"

"I need energy, incompetent slave!” it hissed, tentacles lashing. “I have other worlds to conquer before your pathetic one. Send me more hate--more rage!"

Gary promised obedience as the image faded. He leaned back in his chair and stared at the wall thoughtfully before picking up the phone. "Get Collins,” he said curtly. “John? Our Master is hungry. Let's try…sponsor logos on jerseys. Imply the glowing puck is coming back, too."

He straightened his tie and chuckled. The anguish of a million fans would provide a magnificent feast.


	4. Stoppage of Play

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The real reason Mike Richards is going to the Manchester Monarchs.

"Sasquatch?" Jeff yelled. "The fuck? You're not that tall."

"Just my mom," Mike mumbled. "Got the hair, didn't think I got anything else. Now this."

"Yeah, but…a mate?"

"I gotta, Cartsy. I can't focus, I'm playing for shit. ‘Biological imperative’ they said."

"We could--"

"--No. Gotta run through the snow, hunt in the woods, make a den, a whole lotta other stuff. Can’t have both of us sent down. The team needs you for the playoffs."

“Fuck. But it's not permanent, right?”

“No. Just might take a while to find someone.”

Jeff hugged him tightly. “Come back to me.”


	5. Blue Line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's always a reason for a disastrous start, if you know where to look. No idea about the Pens, though.

Stiles dramatically thunked his forehead on the table, phone to his ear.

"Listen," he interrupted finally, straightening up. "I told you -- there’s magical backlash when you turn a curse against its caster. It's temporary; you'll be back to normal soon. Unlike them." 

He rolled his eyes at the agitated squawking in his ear. "No, anything off-season was just mundane human stupidity. The original curse targeted the team on-ice. When we turned it back on Carter it kept the same conditions."

The voice dropped into a satisfied murmur and Stiles sighed. “Sure, Jarmo, any time. We bill at your usual rate.”


End file.
